One of the more interesting parts of my meeting with my Bishop on Sunday, happened after he'd gotten through trying to commit me to attend Sacrament Meeting.
He said that if anyone asked about me that he would tell them simply that I was a good man, and that he and I had spoken about things and nothing further needed to be said. He then went on to say that the grapevine exists only because people love me and are concerned about me.
First, I felt like calling an audible foul on the idea that the grapevine exists as a natural result of love. BS to that whole idea. But I was nice!
I did think it incredibly interesting that this would be the first thing he brought up as well.
In many ways, my neighborhood is a lot like high school. We found out last week, that a neighbor who lives behind us has been spreading the rumor that we lock our kids outside as a punishment. This lady doesn't even know who we are, she simply calls us... The lady who had all those kids.
This is border-line hilarious for a number of reasons...
First Mrs. Koda is the sweetest woman in the world, and has a hard time getting the kids to have a time-out, so the idea that she would lock them outside is laughable at best.
Second, while we have five kids, this lady will have as many as 10 at her house, due to prior marriages from her and her husband. And we're not currently sucking on a variety of welfare teets either.
And finally, and perhaps funniest of all... This fine devoutly Mormon woman, who sees fit to pass moral judgment on something which she has imagined we do - and we don't... Well, her husband is currently serving a 3 year federal prison sentence for embezzlement. (Oh - But the best part is, that like pretty much everyone serving time... He's completely innocent!!) - I know, I know, I shouldn't spread that around, but it does make the story more interesting :-)
Looking back at high school, and those who made up the rumors and spread them around... It was pretty immature and childish. And the fact that people still do that kind of crap... While I admit it will likely still bother me on some level... Ultimately I thinks it speaks more to their complete lack of character than anything which I may or may not have done.
I remember as a kid being impatient and disgusted with the incredibly childish foolish immature and hurtful behaviors I saw all around me from the other kids, and thinking I couldn't wait to be a grown-up so i could leave all that behind. Because grown-ups didn't act that way, right?
ReplyDeleteI still think grown-ups don't act that way. What I've learned is that an adult body doesn't always mean "grown-up".
That's funny and sad. Really, don't people have better things to do than worry about what other people are doing? I sure do! It's funny, because I'm sure there are rumors about us in our neighborhood also, but I don't really talk to people in the neighborhood so I have no idea what they are. I guess my anti-social behavior has paid off in that sense:)
ReplyDeleteThe rumors about you and your family will probably be there for a while, but over time people will get tired of it and move on. I hope so anyway. I'm just sure to let people see that we're still here and doing great (even better now that we have had a 10% raise) so I think that stumps them a bit. Show them that you can stop going to church and life goes on.
I don't suspect it's actually going to be too bad... I just found it very interesting that this was one of the first things he brought up.
ReplyDeleteI think a big part of the organization keeping it's membership, is the fear of what will happen if a person decides to leave. I wonder if, even if it was only subconsciously, the bishop was attempting to alert me to the 'Dangers' of leaving, in the hopes that I wouldn't.
We're an interesting species, that's for sure!
Ah yes, aren't double-standards fun? Mormons are counseled to avoid gossip and spreading rumors but for the bishop to call the grapevine a "good thing" is not only how he acknowledges that the thing exists, but is trying to justify its existence despite the council to avoid it.
ReplyDeletePeople simply don't like taking the time to research the facts, hence why they accept pretty much anything that someone else will tell them, with or without some kind of evidence to back it up.
It can also be amazing as to how long rumors can persist, even when founded on an untrue statement. How many people think Mormons have horns given that the concept originated from J. Golden Kimball who said, "We have horns and we'll gore the hell outta you!" to scare away a mob? Those guys must've been pret-ty scared.
Thanks Dave! I had no idea that was where the whole horns thing originated. It was a rumor which was pretty rife in a couple of the area's I was in on my mission too, so apparently it was good enough to jump seas and cultures too - craziness!!
ReplyDeleteYou know if J. Golden Kimball were around today, perhaps I might be more inclined to stick around with the Mormons - Gotta love a guy who from what I can tell, appeared to be the same whether he was in Church or out working.
You know Koda, I never thought about it being a threat, but I think you're right. That scares a lot of people into staying in the church, but when you don't care what people think they no longer hold that power over you. Take that!
ReplyDelete