I received an invitation a few weeks ago, to blog over on Mormon Expressions.
For me the invitation came as a huge compliment, although perhaps I should see if they keep my login active over there before considering it a compliment!
Anyway, so after a few weeks of thinking about a good topic, I finally had one come to me.
I need to take care of things with the Bishop - ie. tell him that I'm done, but it's a tough thing to do. I feel like a huge pansy for not just going ahead and doing it, but I've got 34 years of brainwashing, conditioning and training fighting against me.
I wish I could just walk up to him and say something like...
Hey Shane!
So you know how I haven't been at Church much lately? Well, I've decided I'm not coming back, and would you mind just letting the other leaders know, so that they'll leave my kids alone? I like the neighborhood and all, and appreciate your friendship, but as far of official Church stuff - it's over as of now.
Thanks Bro!
It all sounds fine and easy, and then I see him outside, and it's awkward anyway and then my tongue gets all thick and dry and I start to shake and my voice cracks...
There is just way too much emotion involved!
Anyway, so I've been trying to work through it, and I write him letter to help that process along. Generally I don't intend to send them, and this mornings one won't get sent either, but it made me realize something... I don't need a reason to leave. I pondered and prayed, and I got the answer, clear as day that the organization isn't true. It isn't what it claims to be and it's highly corrupt.
That should be enough for him, and should be enough for me, but yet, the underlying need to give a reason remains, and I expect he would like a reason as well.
So that was my topic for my first blog post over on the ME blog...
Reasons and Justification
Go check it out and let me know what you think!
In college, I had a roommate that was good looking, RM, elders quorum president, fit, etc, etc....he had all the qualifications to make any young ladies parents melt with approval, and it showed. He was constantly asked out on dates by the ladies. At first he enjoyed it, but soon it became a scheduling nightmare. He needed a solution for telling these girls no...especially the ones he wasn't attracted to. He wanted the perfect excuse for turning down their solicitations. His mother gave him (and subsequently me) the best advice ever....just say no, without explanation. It worked beautifully. I now say "no, but thank you for asking" when approached with something I don't want to do. I offer no explanations. If asked for an explanation, I tell them that I listen to my inner self, which some people call the spirit, and it is telling me no. If they are Mormon, there is nowhere to go from there. I mean, you've just been witnessed to by the spirit and there is no greater justification than that! Hope this helps. I'm off to read your guest post!
ReplyDeleteThe leadership really like to use the commitment pattern, and nothing is more annoying that having it used on you...
ReplyDeleteUnless you're the one using it, and the target doesn't give you any concerns to resolve!
I think I have my approach down... It's finding the (pardon the gender specific reference ladies) balls to do it!